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The Two-Way
4:09 pm
Fri November 8, 2013

'The Onion' To Halt Decades-Long Assault On Trees

The Onion announced that it will cease producing print editions of the satirical news source, in favor of its digital efforts. Here, an Onion story from July that declared the death of print.
The Onion

Originally published on Fri November 8, 2013 5:51 pm

There comes a time, it seems, when even parodies must face reality. And for The Onion, that time will come in December, when the satirical news source will stop publishing print editions and shift to being all-digital.

That's the news from Milwaukee Public Radio, which calls today "a sad day for the sarcastic among us."

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
3:53 pm
Fri November 8, 2013

Prediction

Originally published on Sat November 9, 2013 8:38 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now panel, what will Toronto Mayor Rob Ford do next? P.J. O'Rourke.

P.J. O'ROURKE: Peter, he will run for higher office.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Well suited he will be. Kyrie O'Connor.

KYRIE O'CONNOR: He's going to become an actor and he's going to star in "Drunken Stupor, the (unintelligible) Story."

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: And Bobcat Goldthwait.

BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT: Host a, like, Funniest Home Videos kind of show with crack-smoking mayors, like Marion Barry and himself.

(LAUGHTER)

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
3:53 pm
Fri November 8, 2013

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on Sat November 9, 2013 8:38 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, on to our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer is worth two points. Carl, can you give us the scores?

CARL KASELL: We have a tie for first place, Peter. Bobcat Goldthwait and Kyrie O'Connor both have three points. P.J. O'Rourke has two.

SAGAL: OK.

BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT: Could we just stop now?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Just let it be.

GOLDTHWAIT: This is my personal best.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
3:53 pm
Fri November 8, 2013

Limericks

Originally published on Sat November 9, 2013 8:38 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Coming up, it's Lightning Fill In The Blank, but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Or, click the contact us link on our website waitwait.npr.org. There you can find out about attending our weekly live shows right here at the Chase Bank Auditorium in Chicago and our upcoming show in Memphis Tennessee on December 19th! Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT...DON'T TELL ME!

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It's All Politics
3:42 pm
Fri November 8, 2013

Obama Donor Behind Third-Party Va. Candidate? Maybe Not

Ken Cuccinelli, the Republican nominee for Virginia governor, speaks with the news media after casting his ballot in Nokesville, Va., on Tuesday.
Cliff Owen AP

Originally published on Fri November 8, 2013 5:42 pm

This week's hot rumor in Virginia: Libertarian gubernatorial candidate Robert Sarvis was a spoiler, bankrolled by an Obama bundler from Texas, to undercut Republican gubernatorial nominee Ken Cuccinelli.

On Election Day, Sarvis captured nearly 7 percent of the vote in a race Cuccinelli lost by less than 3 percentage points to Democrat Terry McAuliffe.

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